How to deal with finding out that your boyfriend is two-timing you

Last update date:30th December 2017

Recently, my boyfriend is acting strange. A woman’s intuition for when something is fishy, is very reliable.

Even if you think something is suspicious, the shock is immeasurable when you find out that they are actually two-timing you.

So, we are going to introduce how to deal with finding out that your boyfriend is two-timing you.

1. First, calm down

The number of people that can stay calm when finding out that they’re being two-timed on is a handful.

There is no one that doesn’t feel bad, if you love them anyone would be hurt.

“Don’t betray others”, “Don’t lie”, these are logics that even little children understand, so of course your boyfriend understands as well.

They are two-timing you knowing well what they are doing, so even if we were to be shaken, start crying it will have little effect.

What is more important than anything is to not irrational act according to your feelings, but calm down, so you won’t be hurt more than necessary.

Being two-timed on is painful, but it isn’t something that you can be released from immediately.

So, calming down is the most important thing.

2. Gather evidence of two-timing

There are many people that lose the motivation to do anything, but this is also a very important thing.

This is such a rational, calm move that it might be scary, but if you care for your boyfriend than you should bring out evidence as well.

Without evidence your boyfriend can talk his way out of it.

Of course, it’s your own free agency to forgive something life two-timing, but will that really be for your boyfriend’s sake.

Your boyfriend will lose the opportunity to apologize for his actions. Once he’s tasted two-timing he may do it over and over again.

Needless to say, you will the opportunity to talk about the reason and the cause for it and resolve it.

If he wasn’t happy with the relationship and two-timed on you, then you need to talk about it.

I would advise you to break up with him, if he doesn’t even have a fragment of guilt.

Plus, in order for this not to become a trauma for you from the pain, you need to get him to apologize.

If you just stand around from the shock ,then you’re going to end up hurting yourself.

In order to have a happy future, you need to gather evidence once you find out that they’re two-timing on you

3. Talk to someone that you can trust about the two-timing

When you’re hurt, It’s hard to rationally make decisions, so talk to someone that you trust after finding out about the two-timing.

Even if you gather evidence by yourself and talk to him about it, there is a chance that he will be mean about it, or break up with you in an unreasonable way.

That’s why it’s important to have a third party.

The criteria for picking a person, is whether or not they’ll be on your side.

If you were to pick your best friend, they have no relation with your boyfriend so he won’t feel embarrassed or ashamed.

If possible, pick someone that you’re boyfriend knows.

If the person is someone that is someone neutral, if there was a definite cause for the two-timing than they will be able to tell both of you.

It might be painful to hear if it is your fault, but if it’s from a neutral position than the possibility that your boyfriend will listen will be higher.

To be told off rationally by an acquaintance, or have them disappointed is hard especially for men.

It’s recommended to have a third party in between in order to prevent your boyfriend from not listening to you, or doing something irrational.

Even if you don’t make up, it’s easier to get over the shock by having someone on your side to talk to you.

For people that have lost the motivation to do anything, just pick someone that you can trust and talk to them about it.

4. Confront them with the evidence of two -timing and apologize.

You make think that this is unreasonable, but if you want to continue with your relationship you must make the reason clear, and apologize whether you are at fault or not.

Even if there was a cause for it, it doesn’t justify two-timing.

But, to your boyfriend it was a trigger for him to think that it was okay to hurt someone.

People that two-time in the first place aren’t thinking logically, and even if it isn’t a reason they’ll make it into one.

Therefore after showing them the evidence and making the cause clear, make a promise that you’ll work them and put in the effort in order to fix it.

Even though it’s hard, if they don’t have the ear to listen or act cocky, then consider breaking up with them.

But, if your boyfriend apologizes and will quit doing so, there is a chance to start over again.

After being hurt, I’m pretty sure there are those that think there’s no way they can apologize, but there aren’t many people that’ll look down upon people that have it in them to calmly gather evidence.

Of course, make sure that your boyfriend promises to never two-time on you again.

The best medicine to make sure your boyfriend doesn’t do it again, is to make your boyfriend to naturally feel guilty.

It’s recommended that you make that day an anniversary and try to go on dates every month on that day, or try not to fight on that day, so that they won’t forget that hard experience or guilt.

Make two-timing a seed of your happiness as well

Even if it is a hard experience at that time, if you continue to seriously date that too will become a good experience.

Among hard and sad experiences there are hints to deepen relationships with people.

It’s important to first calm down, and face what has happened.

In order to take care of yourself and them, make that experience a seed of your happiness.